This might just be one of the best books I've read in ages. In truth, it has absolutely no literary value whatsoever. I didn't learn a single thing from it nor take away any little gem that will forever influence my life. Why did I enjoy it so much, then? Because it was absolute crap.I know what you're thinking... that statement makes no sense, right? Wrong. See, the reason why I loved it so much is that it knows it's awful. It was meant to be and there are absolutely no surprises to be found in that fact. The book that it mocks, Twilight, is worshiped by millions of teenagers and adults alike and yet it's complete and utter rubbish. The fact of the matter is that it blatantly condones abusive relationships and makes them seem glamorous. I mean, after all, who wouldn't put up with some verbal abuse if their glittering, superhuman boyfriend made his demands in soft, flowing language and apparently looked like Robert Pattinson?
Okay, so that wouldn't do anything for me... but I also don't think that Robert Pattinson is even remotely attractive. This, however, is not meant to be a post to bash the series... even if it does suck. It's supposed to be about the benefits, or lack thereof depending on how you look at it, of reading Nightlight. See, the truth is that there really aren't any. Like I said before, you're not going to take a damn thing away from this book but a stitch in your side from laughing through half of it. It's funny, incredibly so, in that it does a perfect job of making fun of everything about the series that makes it so awful. The abusive relationship, the cult following the subpar movie cast has gained, and the absolute shallowness of Belle's thoughts are all dead on. And I had tons of other awesome things that I wanted to say about all this, but I'm in the crew room at work and they tend to frown upon dictating to yourself what you're typing... and I lose track of things too easily.
The one thing I can say is that, yes, I've read the Twilight books. I wasted days of my life that I can never get back on that poor excuse of Anne Rice and/or Charlaine Harris fanfiction. I hated Edward and Jacob pretty much equally... in Edward's case because he was just too over-the-top perfect and Jacob because he was a whiny, obnoxious puppy. That being said, I loved Edwart Mullen. He was the absolute opposite of everything that any girl who reads and loves Twilight would want in a man... and I think that's precisely why I was so fond of him. After all, being a huge nerd myself, why would I not want a boy that builds websites as a hobby and plays video games like it's his job? Aside from the fact that I probably could have beat him up, he's fucking amazing. It makes me incredibly sad, however, that the perfect literary man for me can only be found in a parody of one of the worst book series I've ever read.
So, yeah. If you're looking for a book that will only take about three hours to read... maybe less if you actually have time to sit down for more than five minutes at a time... and you're not a Stephenie Meyer fan, this might just be the perfect read for you. It's a snack as far as literature goes, but it's like a pie in that way... it's a guilty pleasure that you might actually be glad you actually indulged in. Also, I noticed it makes you want to eat apples... a lot. Mostly because the book has about six on them between the front and back covers, so maybe there is at least one benefit to the book after all.
Rating: 3.5/5
