11. 'Dear John' - Nicholas Sparks

I hate Nicholas Sparks books. That's the most important statement that I can make at this moment. I hate his books with a passion and I really am not entirely sure why I bother to read them in the first place. A Walk to Remember I polished off in the span of a few hours at work one day. Dear John really wasn't any better. I have a very hard time enjoying books that don't require any thought to get into them. That's the experience that I had as far as this particular novel goes.

It tells the story of a young man that returns from leave in the Army one summer and meets a beautiful college student that he immediately falls madly in love with. Lo and behold, she falls head over heels for him too and the pair swear that they're going to get married someday and live happily ever after. Then, a number of obstacles throw themselves in the mix... including his father's heart attack and the fact that he reupped when the events of September 11th occurred. So, rather than be the steadfast rock in John's turbulent sea, Savannah ends up falling in love and eventually marrying her childhood friend and neighbor, Tim.

Some other stuff happens here and there, but none of it is truly that important and none of it could possibly make you like such shallow and ill-conceived characters. Savannah, borrowing a term from fanfiction circles, is the worst kind of Mary-Sue imaginable. She's pretty, perfect, and perky... oh yeah... and she was almost raped which is only one of the most overused plot devices in the world. Yes, I realize that it happens a lot. Yes, it has happened to people that I know. No, I do not think that it makes it acceptable to throw into any drama involving college students just to cause tension and make the main characters' 'first time' seem more interesting, heart-wrenching and/or magical. John, himself, was just boring. His father was infinitely more endearing and I was actually happy that Savannah ended up marrying Tim in the end. Though... go figure... she still thought about cheating on her poor husband while he's in the hospital dying of cancer. I know this shit happens, but I just don't know how I feel about seeing that much stereotypical role-playing website drama thrown into one book that's supposed to be a bestseller.

I'm sure romance fans across the world would burn me at the stake if anyone but my sister actually read this, but seriously... I hated it. I will never read anything by Sparks again... and I would gladly burn it if it were mine to do as I pleased with. Sadly, this waste of paper belongs to my roommate, so back to her shelf it must go.

2 out of 5 stars